Confessions

I caught DB pleasing himself. I didn’t know he was home and ran down to basement to throw in a load of laundry and there he was....talk about awkward.  

DB is sooo lazy. He legit never cleans up after himself. Never.  

 I fantasize about riding DB in his home office, damn he’s so hot.  

It makes me super uncomfortable the way DB Looks at me.  

 I found out my boss pays the babysitter 5 dollars less than she pays me but she wants everyone to think she is this generous saint.  

Why do they have to be so damn cheap??  

I’m my bosses security blanket. 100%.

52.  Am I the only one that bathes the kids nightly?! Like why can’t you give your kids a bath? Why would you even want someone else giving your kids a bath every night when you are at home and perfectly capable??

If you add additional tasks you need to add additional money to my check. Period. 

There is currently a ratio in the house of 5 adults to two children. And counting.... why am I here??